Project TEAMS · For mentors and trusted adults

Mentor Guidance Notes

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A mentor is not a coach, a counselor, or a corrector. A mentor is a steady human presence — someone who listens slowly, prays quietly, and remembers what was said last time.

These notes are meant to be read before a meeting, not during one. Carry the posture in, then put the page down.

Four postures

Listen longer than feels comfortable

Most young people are interrupted before they finish a thought. Let the silence sit. The third sentence is usually the truest.

Affirm presence, not performance

Notice who they are before what they did. A mentor's quiet steadiness is more formative than any advice given too quickly.

Guard the conversation

What is shared with you is held in trust. Never carry it sideways to parents, peers, or leaders unless safety requires it — and tell them when it does.

Walk alongside, not ahead

Resist the urge to fix, redirect, or rescue. Formation is slow. Your role is to keep showing up, not to deliver outcomes.

Opening questions

Use one. Not all five. Let the conversation breathe.

  • What's something you've been carrying this week that no one has asked about?
  • Where have you felt seen lately — and where have you felt invisible?
  • What is one thing you're hoping for that you haven't said out loud?
  • Is there anything you've been told about yourself that doesn't feel true?
  • What would rest actually look like for you right now?

Quiet reminders

  • — You are not their parent, their pastor, or their therapist. You are their witness.
  • — Confidentiality has one exception: when someone is being harmed or is at risk of harm. Name that exception out loud, early.
  • — If you sense something beyond your role, gently bring in a parent, counselor, or pastor — with the young person's knowledge.
  • — End every meeting with a short blessing or word of encouragement. They will remember it longer than your advice.

If you want to go further

Mentorship works best inside a wider rhythm. If you'd like to be paired with a young person formally, or join a community of other mentors, the Faithful Mentorship space is open to you.